


Hurt

by BellarmyBlake



Series: It's Enough [26]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-25
Updated: 2015-02-25
Packaged: 2018-03-15 04:44:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3433997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BellarmyBlake/pseuds/BellarmyBlake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: I need some CS angst. When Neal first sees Emma again he kisses her and Killian believes that she has made her choice. Killian keeps his distance and she notices it and it hurts because she doesn't know why he is acting this way until David tells her that Killian say the kiss and he is planning on leaving town tonight. I need fluff at the end :)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hurt

It was just after Neal had been excused from the hospital that it happened. Everyone was asking Emma what to do now, and where Rumplestiltskin was and how he was alive, and she was getting a headache. Killian was right there beside her - as always - trying to deflect some of the questions from her to himself. It was right when Leroy asked, in his loud voice, why the hell Gold was still alive, when Emma saw Neal making his way through the crowd gathered around Emma, pushing everyone aside that stood in his way. His eyes were dead set on hers, and before Emma could do anything, he had his arms wrapped around her and his lips pressed against hers. Gasps went around the crowd, a few aww's here and there, but Emma could do nothing else but stand there and take it. She was too surprised to do anything else.

Neal was kissing her.

For the first time in 11 years, he was kissing her and she…

She felt nothing.

There was no fire that lit the moment his lips touched hers, there were no butterflies in her stomach, there was…nothing.

"God, I've missed you, Emma." Neal whispered against her lips, stroking her hair gently. "I'm sorry I didn't find you, I should've been the one…"

But she cut him off by pushing him away, staring at him. "What the hell are you doing?"

Neal blinked in surprise. "Emma, I - "

"No, Neal…you don't get to barge back into my life like that and  _kiss_  me!" she said, her eyes searching frantically (and without her really being aware of it) for Killian.  _He was nowhere in sight_. "We are not together, Neal!"

"Okay, Emma, look, I'm sorry. I just thought…"

Emma started to turn around. "Yeah well, maybe you should ask before you act."

-cs-

Two days passed and Killian kept his distance. He helped out, of course, but never looked at her, never spoke to her, and Emma didn't get it. Had she done something? Did he realize his life as a hero wasn't all that it was cracked up to be? She couldn't figure it out, and it started to hurt more and more.

David kept throwing both of them worried glances while they were in his company, but Emma stubbornly ignored the looks and the pirate. If he so desired his distance, she wouldn't force her company on him. She could deal.

Except, that she could not, in fact, deal.

She hated that he wasn't talking to her anymore, she hated that she couldn't rely on him to catch her when she fell anymore. She was hurting inside, and she couldn't let it out anymore. The one that understood her wasn't there for her.

Her stress came back to haunt her in the form of the worst flu she'd ever had. She had a high fever, threw up twice an hour and couldn't keep food down if she wanted to, was delirious. She was confined to bed, forced to relax, forced to think about everything, because she had no other choice.

Her parents took care of her most of the time, and two days in, she was clear enough to get some tea inside of her. Her father sat at her bedside, looking at her with a concerned frown.

"Killian's been asking how you've been." David said in the end, making her choke on her tea. "Careful."

"Why? I thought he hated me." Emma said bitterly.

David shook his head. "Emma! He's hurt!"

Emma raised a brow. " _He's_  hurt?  _I'm_  hurt! Out of the blue, he doesn't talk to me anymore, downright  _ignores_ me, and  _he_ 's hurt?" She scoffed at the nerve of that pirate.

David sighed, taking her hand and giving it a fatherly kiss. "Sweetie, he saw Neal kiss you."

"So?" Emma exclaimed. "I pushed him away!"

"Killian had left by then. He thinks you've made your choice."

Emma sat back against the headboard, flabbergasted for a moment. Killian thought she'd chosen Neal? So that's why he'd been ignoring her! That's why he'd been acting so coldly. "Oh God, I'm so stupid…" Emma groaned.

"It gets worse." her father said carefully, knowing she had her mother's temper. She looked up at him, coaxing him to keep talking, because how could this get worse? "He's leaving tonight."

Emma's heart froze. "Leaving? Leaving, how?"

"Leaving as in, the Jolly Roger is set to sail in a couple of hours."

She reached over and grabbed her father by the lapels of his jacket. "You can't let him leave! He can't leave! I need him!"

"You should tell him that."

"I'm currently confined to bed." Emma said dryly, giving him the famous Snow White death glare. "Please, dad. Just ask him to come over here."

David sighed. "Fine. I'll try." He rose and kissed the top of her head. "Get some rest, Emma." Then he left and Emma remained behind, restless. Her mind was spinning. Killian was heartbroken, she got it now. And she felt guilty as fuck.

Eventually she drifted off to a restless slumber, in which she had nightmares of Killian leaving her behind in favor of the sea. The worst thing was, that she would leave her behind for the sea, too.

"Swan?" A soft, but cold voice woke her from her sleep, and she saw him standing at the edge of her bed. There was concern flashing in his eyes, poorly hidden by hard coldness. "Your father informed me that you wished to see me?" He sounded like a lieutenant talking to his princess.

"Killian, thank God." she said, and startled when she heard her own voice. It was hoarse, and it hurt to talk. He frowned with worry, before wiping it off his face again. "Ow."

"Why did you want me here, Swan? Come to rub me in the face how happy you are without me? Speaking of, where is Baelfire?" He spat every word at her with as much venom as he could muster, making her flinch at every rise of his tone. She had hurt him so bad. "Shouldn't he be taking care of his woman?"

Oh, but now he crossed the line. "I'm not  _his_  woman, pirate!" she tried to yell, but it came out as a raspy whisper. "Matter of fact, I'm  _no one's_  woman! How dare you?" He looked at her quite stoicly, as if this wasn't coming through at all. But she knew he'd heard her. "Why are you leaving?" said Emma, seeing that she wasn't getting anywhere.

"If you have to ask, then my being here has no point, and I can take my leave." He turned around to leave.

"No, wait!" Emma shout-whispered. He stopped, his back still to her. "Please, don't go. I know why you're leaving. I just…I'm trying to ask you to stay. Please."

He spun around viciously, staring daggers at her, making her flinch again. "Stay? Why in the world would I stay?! There's nothing for me here! You chose him, and I'm going to back off, for your happiness! But that doesn't mean I have to stay and have my heart ripped out every time I see you!" He paced over to her side, and she looked up at him. He was completely unpredictable, she had no idea what he was going to do, and it frightened her. "So no, thank you kindly, I will not stay."

"I didn't choose him." Emma whispered.

He froze slightly, blinking. "Pardon me?"

"I didn't choose him."

"But you kissed…" he said, coolly. His eyes were still emotionless and he crossed his arms to protect himself.

"He kissed me." Emma explained. "I pushed him away. I felt nothing. It lacked all the passion I'm looking for…" Suddenly she felt another wave of puke coming up. "The bucket!" she moaned, pointing at it. "Please!"

At her desperate plea, he acted instantly. The bucket was on her lap the next moment, and she let it all go. It was humiliating, and horrible, but he didn't complain. He held her hair back with his hand and rubbed her back soothingly. It felt like their normal relationship in a blink of an eye.

When she was done, he got rid of the nasty substance - mostly stomach acid, since she had nothing more than tea in her system - and the returned with a damp washcloth to wipe her face with. He was being so gentle. "Thank you." Emma said, breathless from throwing up.

"Anytime, lass." Killian whispered.

"I'm sorry. I should've told you immediately, but I was too blind to see. Please, don't leave me." she said softly, tears threatening.

He kissed the top of her head. "Alright, lass. Why don't you rest for now, and we'll talk about this when you're better?" Grateful, with a lump in her throat, she nodded. "I won't leave. I promise."

"Thank you." He smiled, and started to leave, but Emma grabbed his arm. "Will you stay?"

Killian smiled softly. "You sure?"

"I don't wanna be alone." she whispered. He nodded, kicked off his boots and sat down next to her burning body. "Thank you, Killian."

"You're welcome, love." he whispered. "Now sleep. Don't worry anymore. I'm not going anywhere."

She rolled on her side against him, snuggling up against his warm body, and she took a deep breath before closing her eyes.

She didn't worry.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos feed my muse, and she's a hungry lass! If you could take a moment, it would make my day!


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